Welcome to the 100th blog post for Humbly Courageous! Wow! A lot of heart went into these blog posts. There is very little I have left out and not shared. I mean a girl has to have a few secrets, right?! But seriously, when I started writing, being anything less than completely vulnerable didn’t feel honest, and I knew if I really wanted to reach people, I had to tell the good, the bad and the ugly. That’s what I set out to do, and now this week finds me writing my 100th blog post. To say I have been blessed by being vulnerable is an understatement. Sometimes, I look at these comments and feel like I’m dreaming. It’s what I always wanted. To feel that sense of connection, and like I am helping somebody in this world who feels alone like I once did.
The 44 years of waiting, was it a waste of time or a lesson in living well? My faith tells me it was, of course, part of my life’s plan. Still, I sometimes wrestle with the thought of all the wasted time when I was angry, and I didn’t appreciate the goodness in my life enough. I was bitter because I was disabled and didn’t have a diagnosis. Constantly swimming upstream. I lived life against myself, doing my best to avoid my reality. Or what even was my reality? I didn’t even know. I could look at it as so much wasted time. At times, I feel like I’m desperately trying to make up for all those years. There’s not enough hours in a day. The truth is I can’t go back. I have to accept that as a lesson, and it’s what got me where I am today, along with a lot of hard work. Without it, I never could have experienced what I’m going to share with you today. These are the words of people I’ve never met face to face. I hope to, but I haven’t yet. Their words help me as much as they say my blog posts help them. This is what they have had to say to me….
P.S. This past Tuesday I celebrated the 4th birthday of my diagnosis day. It’s truly a celebration, and a great day of reflection for me. I’m just so grateful to have this day to celebrate!
